Falling in Love

When I hear these words ‘Falling in love’ my face lights up with joy, and I begin to think of the experiences I have had, how it felt like being in love and being loved. So then what does it mean to fall in love? ‘Falling in love’ sounds like one is walking blindly until s/he falls into a ditch and then exclaim, ‘I have fallen in love!’ Well, it is a journey that one goes through. It all begins with having a crush on a person and then other reasons. (See the article on CRUSH)

Attraction begins to grow and a desire to see the face of the person, talk or just to share ideas or joke around begins. All this comes after I have accepted myself as I am, and love myself healthily that I will be able then to have the capacity to reach out, love another and wish to begin to share my life journey with him/her.

There are many things said about falling in love, that ‘it was love at first sight’ or ‘I found myself having fallen in love with you just like that!’. Well, it takes more than instant attraction at first sight. Sometime back, I was walking in the streets and I came across a handsome young man, we looked at each other as we passed and after a few steps I found myself turning to have a better look at him only to find out that he too had just done the same thing, we smiled at each other, he turned and began walking back towards me and I also turned and waited for him to reach me. He introduced himself and I did the same, but since we were both in a hurry we agreed to get to know each other better and so we exchanged phone numbers.

That evening I got a text message from him. We began sharing some personal information as a way of knowing each other slowly. Then whenever we would get a chance within the day we would check on each other to see how the day was going and share whatever experiences we had gone through. At the end of the day we would spend more time to talk about everything that came to mind and slowly we began to discover that love and acceptance was growing between us. It was not a smooth journey because we were two unique people with different backgrounds and perspectives of life, however, along the way we discovered what would make the other uncomfortable and with the ability to express ourselves, love continued to draw us stronger together.

So falling in love is not a magical feeling that just appears from thin air, it all begins from somewhere and with the passage of time it grows mutually, not one-sided, until the two people take this journey together to see where it will lead them.

Debbie’s Tips

How to know if I am in love:

  • Pay attention to the feelings deep within me especially towards this particular person.
  • Admit what I feel and take some time to see how to go about the feeling of love that I am experiencing.
  • Give time to the other person also to discover that which they are feeling without imposing my own feelings.
  • Accept myself as a unique person and with this in mind allow myself to reach out and begin this journey of loving another person.
  • Take time to listen to the other person as they begin to open up and share their life with me.
  • Spare some time to spend with the person I am developing a relationship with so as to gradually make them a part of my life.
  • Respond to this person with love so that in growing to know him/her I can love him/her as s/he is.

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